Division of labor.

Are there things in your household that you have no idea how to do? Even though one would assume as a fully functioning adult, these are things you should be able to do. For example, our smoke detectors only need their batteries replaced in the middle of the night. We have five (which seems excessive for our 1300 square foot house) and the battery only chirps at 3 AM. Battery replacement falls on Lance. This happened the other night at 3:04 AM.

“Lance. The smoke alarm is beeping.”

“Whaattt…  I don’t hear anything.”

“LANCE. The smoke alarm is beeping. Go find which one it is before it sets the rest of them off and wakes up Lucan.”

“BEEP!”

“LANCE.”

“Okay, okay, okay. I’m up.”

Yes, since apparently the beeping smoke detector only wakes me up, I could be the one to go and rip the battery out of the alarm and stumble back to bed. But my rationale is Lance is taller (I can barely reach the smoke detector – with the step stool - in the shorter areas and there’s no way I can reach the one on the vaulted ceiling), my eyesight is blurry at best at this time of day and all things mechanical fall under Lance’s responsibility. Besides, it’s cold outside the covers. This is how I figure smoke detector batteries fall under Lance’s duties. 

Truth of the matter, in our marriage there is a division of labor over responsibilities. Lance does our taxes, changes the furnace filter (I don’t even know where the filter is located), writes out the daycare checks, refills the water in the humidifier, pays most bills (the bills I’m in charge of I just setup to autopay) takes care of anything car related, makes waffles and hash brown  and resets the internet router (which apparently I could learn to do because all Lance does is unplug it). Things that fall under my responsibility: all ironing (Lance says that he just puts more wrinkles into things – I think he just doesn’t want to learn), menu planning (if it were up to Lance we’d have leftovers and enchiladas every night), taking care of FSA reimbursements (I let Lance do the medical ones last year because they were coming out of his paycheck. As a result, last week Lance was trying to find receipts for things in October), closet organization and calendar management. 

Oh. I don’t make coffee. I know, I know. We both love coffee and drink it equally. Coffee making should be a shared duty. But I can never remember how many scoops equal how much water; hence Lance always is the one to make the coffee in our house. 

Lucan likes to see us share duties. He gets upset if one of us puts him in his shoes. “Mommy’s turn, Daddy!” We need to share. But there are specific things Lucan has us do for him – I am the only one allowed to trim his nails or put essential oils on his feet. Daddy is the only one allowed to take him to daycare. He gets upset if I try and overstep my duties and drop Lucan off in the morning. I pick out what Lucan is going to wear everyday. Lance gets too stressed out if he has to pick.

How do you split responsibilities at your house?

28 Things in February

1. I was reflecting the other night about this exact time one year ago. One year ago, on my way to cooking club, I got an emergency call from my friend Jessie to come and watch her other two kids while she brought Lincoln to the ER. I’m thankful for how far Lincoln has come in this one year.
2. My in-laws. They graciously watched Lucan for a week while we were in between daycares.
3. Gainful employment.
4. Rice crispy bars. You can eat them for breakfast – right? Cereal, marshmallows … lucky charms?
5. God’s provision in a readily available daycare center. We had to make a hurried decision to end our previous daycare and God provided a solution basically on our doorstep.
6. Olympics. It’s such a special time and creates such a feeling of unity within the USA.
7. Scratch cupcakes. I bought some for Lance for Valentine’s Day. Let’s not talk about the fact that most of the flavors were ones I liked.
8. Flying Mango. I just love that place.
9. I love living in a place that has all four seasons. That being said, I think I’ve had my snow fill for the year.
10. Dove chocolates. Lucan keeps eating all of mine.
11. We tried to do a no-spend February, but about 6 days into it I decided that it was stupid. So I’m thankful for our budget. Kind of.
12. The chance to make a few extra dollars doing an in-store demo for Axe Peace (man, I smelled like a teenage boy going to a school dance) and some display audits at local grocery stores.
13. Story time at the library
14. Facetiming with my parents. Lucan licked the ipad.
15. Vacation days.
16. Aveda stress-fix lavender lotion. It smells divine.
17. Mushrooms. Lance and I love extra mushrooms in many things. But not Asian food.
18. “Healthy” banana bread made with whole wheat flour, flax and very little sugar. I like my un-healthy version better, but Lucan happily eats the “healthy” version.
19. Having a favorite clerk at our local grocery store.
20. Downton Abbey! I’m sad now that it’s over for another 10 months. Actually, devastated is more like it.
21. Being asked to guest post here.
22. Handy husband – fixed the turn signal on our SUV and installed Lu’s bedrail without instructions.
23. Transitioning Lucan out of his crib. Right now we’ve just removed one of the side’s on his crib and put up a partial bedrail. But the transition has gone well. Lucan has his faults; but he’s always stayed in bed and slept well.
24. Discounted produce!
25. Being able to pick Lucan up early enough from daycare to watch Curious George together. Silly monkey!
26. Lucan has regained some of his normal eating habits. There was a time after he got back from his grandparents that he wanted to eat nothing I made. But we’re regaining normalcy. I would go nuts if Lucan consistently boycotted what I made for supper.
27. Blessing an expecting mom at cooking club with a basket of baby stuff
28. A month of being relatively sickness free! 

We went on one snowy Saturday to Clifford Story Time at the library. After being super excited about going, this was as close as Lucan wanted to get to Clifford. Look at the way Lucan is rebuffing a hug from Clifford.

But Lucan was not afraid of Peeta. He ran up to the cutout and said "Take my picture mommy!" #teamPeeta

Both Lance and Lucan are big fans of Katniss. Weirdos.

A disaster of a music class.

Don't let the smiles fool you. No one was smiling here.

 

The other day I wrote a review on DesMoinesParent.com about a recent music class I attended with Lucan. If you read between the lines, I didn’t really say anything favorable about the experience. While I didn’t want to write anything discouraging because it wasn’t really their fault that we had a HORRIBLE time, they didn’t really help the matter either. 

In hindsight, I probably should have done a different Saturday. Lucan had just finished his first week at his new daycare/school and every morning had been rough. Lucan had spent the previous week in transition (i.e.: we had no daycare) at his grandparents and getting back into a routine had been difficult, especially mornings. Mornings are always hectic trying to get everyone out of the door on time and in a good humor to boot. Add in a new daycare routine and coming off of a week of sleeping in, everyone was spent. I should have taken that Saturday to just bum around the house and chill. Instead I committed us to a mommy and me music class so I could write my review and not feel delinquent. BAD IDEA.

Picture a circle of well-dressed moms and baby Gap kiddos all patiently clapping their hands and humming along to some asinine Irish folk song. Then insert reluctant Lucan and sweaty Kara (I swear the room was like 200 degrees) and you can start imagining how things started. Lucan then proceeded to ask multiple times where his snack was (LOUDLY I might add) and refuse to climb off my lap. The group leader had everyone rise and dance around a circle. I, on the other hand, while sweating, was forced to drag Lucan. When he refused to be drug anymore, I had to pick up and carry his suddenly limp, unable to-stand-on-his-own body and gamely smile with the rest of the moms. At that point I was managing. Even with the annoying Celtic music that everyone else seemed to know the words to while I was still wondering what ever happened to “Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star.” (for real – how much cultural awakening do two year-olds need?)

But things started to really unravel when the parachute was brought out. You know the parachute in which kids flop it up and down and have a blast? Yeah, Lucan got really excited by it too. Until the folk song ended and it had to get put away. Lucan wasn’t done playing and was super pissed when it was put back. And when I say “super pissed” I mean “the-world-has-ended-and-my-mom-told-me-the-tooth-fairy-isn’t-real” pissed. 

It was at that point in Lucan’s wailing that we got asked to leave class. Fantastic. Mom-humiliation at its best. So Lucan and I stepped outside and he finished his tantrum. I wanted to sneak back into the sweat room to retrieve our stuff but the door was locked. I had to bang on the door to get back in and gather up our stuff (so much for slipping in unnoticed). And the icing on the cake: being asked at the end of class if we wanted to sign up for classes for the rest of year. Ha. NOT ON YOUR LIFE. 

Again, it wasn’t the music class’ fault we had a terrible time, but rather an accumulation of bad circumstances. If you want to read my review, check it out here. Besides, you might happen to have an affinity for Irish folk songs. :)

Guest Post on Ever After Blueprint - Becoming One

Today I'm posting over on Ever After Blueprint. Andrea is a Des Moines mom, great writer and always has some interesting tidbit to share on her blog. While Andrea and I haven't officially met in "real life" we're friends via the internet with plans on connecting sometime soon! It was sweet when she asked me to a write little post for her corner of the internet.

How long have you been married?
Lance and I married just out of college – so 8 years this summer! Wow. We’re planning on taking a momentous anniversary trip for our 10 year anniversary so we should probably start dreaming and planning now.

What was one of your biggest challenges the first few months of marriage?
Lance and I were a long distance relationship couple the entire three years of college we dated. So when we went from only seeing each other on weekends to being married and LIVING together, it was an interesting transition.  Click on over to read the full post...

Amy Poehler's Take on Exercise

Personal trainers are people who yell at you to keep pushing. I'm like, "No, you keep pushing!" My idea of the perfect exercise class is this: The teacher gives us all a hug and goes, "You did it! You showed up! Let's lie down." We all lie down and she's like, "How is everybody feeling?" We're like, "Great!" And the teacher's like, "Great!" Then we all get to leave 20 minutes early. - excerpt taken from Poehler's interview with Ladies Home Journal.

Yes Amy, that's how I view exercise classes too :)
Just a little funny for your Tuesday.

Blessed by our friends.

Have I ever told you that I have I have amazing friends that bless us and help us out in daycare pinches?

These are the friends that have watched Lucan for us when we've either had daycare cancellations or other conflicts: Emily, Jessie, Sarah F, Leah, Nicole, Abby H, Katie, Bree and Kurt/Gina. All of these are kind people who let us infringe on their days and their schedules.
So this is a little tribute to those people who have helped us out!

Emily - I love that you call us your Des Moines family. You are kind-hearted, generous (you are always giving us your boys' castoffs which are fantastic) and considerate. Don't worry, we don't mind that your prayer requests are the same week after week :)

Jessie - we know how to share a laugh and turn a listening ear to the other person's personal/financial/daycare/working mom's/family's woes. You keep me in check. You are the fun mom who always has some fun, interactive activity for your kids. And I've run into you or your children at Target more frequently than any other person I know. That must say something about both of us.

Sarah F - you have a sweet disposition and a certain thoughtfulness that is not replicated in any other person I know. And you are always my first pick for Bible trivia. If you change your mind about wanting to homeschool other kiddos (ie: Lucan), he'll be at your doorstep the next day.

Leah - if anyone was a super mom, it is you. I know we all pick the areas that are important to us and where we are going to focus our energies on, but you seem to be excelling in quite a few areas. I have one of those "I don't know how she does it" mentalities about you. Case in point - your fruit pizza.

Nicole - congratulations on being the most well-spoken and intelligent person I know. Really. But in addition to being well-spoken, you are also unexpected. You like Jay-Z. And prefer to drive in manual. And love clay-mation (which kind of freaks me out). Yes, Nicole you are unorthodox but that's what makes you Nicole.

Abby - you have a sly sense of humor that I appreciate. I don't actually see you much, but you are a fun gal. Despite your 9:30 bedtime :) And even though your kiddos are older than Lu, you'll say yes to watching Lu (even when it disrupts your life) because you know life is hard without family in town.

Katie - you are a big-hearted (and big-haired, which I will forever be jealous of!) gal who is always on the go. You are talented and have the gift for making everyone feel loved. There's something to be said for the girl who makes everyone always feels like they are a friend. (sorry about the x on your face Jon, but you aren't part of this post)

Bree - you make me feel normal. Like a normal mom living with normal life among a herd of boys. You are considerate of other people and their feelings. There's something to be said about people who think before they speak. I need more of this!

Kurt/Gina - Lucan loves you both so much. He loves Gina especially (the other day at lunch we were praying for our friends and Lu had us pray for Gina twice. And he calls Kurt "Kurtin" - I think it comes from referring to you guys as Kurt-and-Gina. Lucan is always much happier when we give one of you a ride to small group). You both are some of the most genuine people I know.

Thank you friends for watching our son when we've been desperate. You don't know how much you have helped us!

*all pictures were taken off of facebook. If you don't like them, well you probably shouldn't have had them on FB to begin with! 

Thankful in January

1. 1. Friends who are kind to watch Lucan on their snow days off
   2. 2. New Year’s Day friend brunches
   3. Downton Abbey returns!
   4. Friendly chats with the librarian at Target – because I’m the cool kid.
   5. Engagement announcements
   6. Friends who are super-moms who will watch Lucan in daycare pinches
   7. A clean house = guests are coming
   8. 90’s music stations at work. Oh the memories!
   9. Spending MLK day off and cleaning up the “dumping ground” in our house.
   10. A husband who will make multiple trips to the grocery store in one day to pick up ingredients I’ve forgotten.
   11. Cooking club’s theme of New Year’s Resolutions and lots of pasta. Our resolutions must have something to do with carb loading :)
   12. Crazy hot yoga classes and sweating out of my shins. But I'm more thankful that Lance encourages me to go to yoga classes. It's one of those things that energize me. I don't think that I'll ever be a runner, but I've fallen in love with yoga.
   13. Discovering that Hy-Vee carries their own generic brand of almond milk.
   14. Fabulous decaf chai lattes at Smokey Row with friends for a birthday celebration.
   15. Friends who affirm that I’m not crazy.
   16. Generous parents who watch Lucan during date night.
   17. A handy husband (I think this is a reoccurring blessing as we live in a 20 year-old house with the original appliances and drive cars with old age “twinges.”
   18. Having the opportunity to go to a friend’s house for supper instead of being the one hosting for a change. I won’t turn down the chance to NOT cook!
   19. My new camelbak water bottle and spending 2 cents on it - bargain win.
   20. The opportunity to exam why I write. Look for a future post on this.
   21. Finally figuring out how to facetime. I know - I’m so “with it.”
   22. New daycare opportunities.
   23. Making new blog friends.
   24. Letting myself say "no" and not beating myself up over it.
   25. But saying "yes" to something and being really blessed by it even though I was dragging my feet. 
   26.  Having a kissing contest with Lucan. So sweet.
   27. Emails from friends who keep me grounded. 
   28. Checking out and watching Person of Interest Seasons 1 and 2 from our local library. Again, I'm such a library nerd. 
   29. The bonding of our small group. I'm reminded on Thursday nights how much these people mean to me.
   30. Finally getting to read some of the book recommendations off of Goodreads.com - "The Orphan Train," "Looking for Alaska" and "The Fault in Our Stars."
   31. A lot of my friends have birthdays in January and I'm thankful and hopeful that on that day each year they feel special and loved.