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Lucan update

Let me remind you (and myself for that matter) that this is not the Gracelyn show. Contrary to what this blog looks like, Lucan is still around. :)

Like most people and jobs, we have our good and bad days around here. There are some days where he is just the sweetest thing to his parents and his sister. Then there are the other days where he is an ornery mess. Lu is stubborn and has very specific ideas of how things should go. Most of the time he is very sweet and helpful with Gracelyn. He understands what it means to be "big brother" and to look out for his little sis. Needless to say, Gracie loves to tag along with big brother. But sometimes he forgets that he's three years older than she is and plays a little rough. Gracie always recovers quickly but we often remind him to be gentle. In fact, I hate to think how often the words "gentle!" or "careful!" come out of my mouth. Lu will jump in to give Gracie a drink of milk or give her a bite when I need him to help. They both love to snuggle on soft blankets and bury their faces in the warmth. It's pretty precious.

Somewhere around Christmas Lu must have experienced a growth spurt because he had no pants that were long enough. All of those 4T pants were suddenly ankle length. He's fairly passionate about NOT wearing "swishy pants" (probably because I can hear him coming and he can't be sneaky) and adamantly wanting to wear fuzzy fleece pants all the time. I suppose for this reason jammies continue to be a fan favorite.

Preschool has been good. He has crappy penmanship but an imagination a mile wide. Lu is articulate and quite verbal. Of course if you've ever spent 10 minutes with Lucan you already know this. His mouth just keeps on going and going! Needless to say, we've had some problems at preschool with interrupting. We're working on it. His blessed teacher, Miss Paula, says that Lu likes everyone and talks to everyone. Very true. Lucan is the epitome of "there are no strangers, just friends I haven't met yet." For example, as told by Miss Paula, "Lucan talks to everyone. He even asks the gym teacher what the rest of his students are doing that day." "Lucan has no one particular friend. He talks and plays with everyone!"



And my example of no stranger danger:
Me: "Lucan, what do you do if a stranger offers you candy to get in their car?"
Lucan, pauses and thinks for a moment: "Say - yes, please!"
Me: shakes my head in disbelief.

Example #2 of no stranger danger, at Target, waiting to get my flu shot:
Lucan: "Hello stranger! How are you?"
He did this to several different people, with both Lance and myself. And on another entirely different shopping trip, as we were waiting to check out, Lucan proceeded to comment on every single item the woman in front of us was buying. Poor lady had to justify why she needed three packs of hangers.

Lu has known all of his letters for quite a while and has a good attention span when it comes to stories. Storytime at the library is one of our weekly favorites. #readersareleaders

Lucan continues to be the world's best four year old eater. I have somehow convinced him that brussel sprouts and roasted broccoli are his favorite foods. If it has sour cream, he'll eat it.

Routine is a good thing in Lu's life. He thrives on knowing what to expect, what his responsibilities are and what's coming up next. He knows in the morning he needs to use the restroom, get himself dressed, find some breakfast and then make sure his backpack has shoes, hat and gloves. 2 PM is nap time. Dad comes home at 5:45 and we eat supper. Wednesday is library and AWANAs day. Saturday he gets to watch morning cartoons. Sunday is church.

Bless my son's heart, but he is impulsive. Lu has a smiley face chart at school so he gets a happy face when he's well behaved in each segment of his morning. If he does well overall, he gets a star on his good behavior chart at home. I told him once he fills up the entire chart, we'll get him a new toy. He thinks he's getting a motorcycle. I was thinking more along the lines of legos or an add-on set of magna-tiles. Life is hard.

The following series of photos features classic Lucan. Him, wearing his milk cup on his face and thinking he's the best thing since sliced bread (and of course me documenting it. I know that I'm only encouraging his antics).

I think the thing that I would sum up by saying is that Lu has a heart for people and their potential to be friends. And that he has no filter :) 

Ways I've Ruined my Children

Everyday I think that I’ve ruined my child.

I don’t think there is any job that comes with more self-doubt or criticism then being a mom. With the exception of being the POTUS (President of the United States – Lance asked me what that meant so it occurred to me that it’s not just a standard acronym that everyone knows) or some other world leader, I don’t think there is a job that has more of a personal stake.

Today’s self-doubt? My oldest is four and has yet to participate in any organized sport or some sort of musical endeavor. I have friends whose children have been dribbling soccer balls as long as they have been walking. Clearly my child will suffer the social repercussions of not participating in a group sport at the age of four.

I am not doing baby-led weaning in any form. I make purees for my little and thought I was finally doing something right because I was making food for her. Now I’m fairly convinced that she’ll never feed herself or eat “real” food.

We don’t always brush my eldest’s teeth in the morning. I just don’t have the time. Yes, I know.

He also knows the order of the PBS kid show lineup.

Just the other day he asked me when he is going to get to take swim lessons. Crap.

I can’t bear to her my daughter cry, so every time she cries, I pick her up. Yep, I’ve ruined her.

Lucan told me last time at Chick-fil-A that we eat there a lot. To his point, we did eat there twice that week.

He also told me tonight that “supper smelled funky.” To his point, yes, fish sauce does smell a bit. He also likes my MIL’s cooking better than my own. This is probably due to the fact that she doesn’t hide zucchini in her spaghetti sauce.

I fall more on the path of helicopter parent than free-range parent. If you read enough articles, helicopter parenting with MOST DEFINITELY ruin a child. Looking at who I am with baby #2, I acknowledge that I’m definitely more relaxed this time around but by no means am I a chill mom. Yes, I worry that my hovering will ruin both of them but it outweighs my fear of them being taken out of my backyard while I’m not watching.

My point is that motherhood is hard. There’s no instruction manual. There are more moments I care to admit that I have no idea what I’m doing and I’m second guessing myself. The only thing I can do is follow my instincts and ask everyday for God to cover all the mistakes I’m making with His grace.

Lucan's 4th Birthday - Construction Party!

Themed parties are fun. To date, we've had: a crabby party, a Hungry Caterpillar party, a milk and cookies party and now a construction equipment party. Yes, they're work but because we don't do much throughout the year I don't feel bad about throwing Lucan a cute birthday party. Besides, you only have one birthday a year and you deserve to be celebrated!

 

Thanks to my friend Molly, this was by far the easiest party I've thrown for Lu so far. She gave me the digital printable files and lent me the construction tape wreath and signs. I utilized Lu's construction toys as decorations and did a party first for me: tackled the cake instead of buying one. I priced themed cakes and just had a hard time justifying spending $50+ on one. My momma threw me a bone and baked the cakes for me and then I (along with Lance who I proceeded to tell he was doing everything WRONG) decorated the cake the night before.

 

I also had party bags for all of the kiddos which contained a swirly straw, silly string and some other little party favors. But it appears I forgot to take a picture of that!

 

 

This will probably be the last time we have the main birthday party at my parents' house. I imagine Lu will want to have a friends' party at some point and we'll have to have that in Des Moines. It's been nice having them at my folks' house because then I don't have to clean!

Molly's caution tape wreath. Lu told me "mommy what a pretty spring wreath!"

Dirt and Worms. Because if you are having a construction party and will be digging, of course you'll encounter dirt and worms!

I placed Lu's construction toys randomly around to be used as décor. No heavy lifting on my part :)

Molly's "Happy Birthday" sign. Again, thank goodness for Molly.

My mom was a bargain shopper and found plates, hats, napkins and party blowers on clearance for me at Wal-Mart. Yay mom!

This cake was a hot chocolately mess. But because it was a "dump" cake that was okay. We layered chocolate cake with LOTS of chocolate frosting and added crushed oreos as dirt pieces and cut up snickers and mini kit kats as bricks. We also used malt balls as rocks. The finishing touch were the mini construction diggers we placed on to complete our construction site.

Lots of chocolate.

Construction bears AKA teddy grams.

I cleaned out Lu's dump truck and poured chex mix into it to act like it was dumping it into the bowl.

I called the chex mix "nuts and bolts." There were ZERO nuts in it. Details.

Molly's signs.

Singing happy birthday and eyeing the lit candles.

Successful blowing of the candles.

My mom also found a construction table cloth for the present table.

Lu loves Paw Patrol. I think if I would have left it up to him, his party theme would have been Paw Patrol themed.

Happy birthday buddy!

We are lucky to celebrate Lu's birthday every year and make it special for him!

A funny face.

 

Lucan wanted to try on Lance's safety glasses. I thought he looked pretty silly so we took a couple of photos to capture the moment.

 

Lu is at an age where all he wants to do are make silly faces or give me fake smiles. Usually I try to have him say something off beat in hopes of eliciting a "genuine" smile instead of random pasted on smiles.

 

Sometimes it works. And sometimes you just have to take photos with safety goggles. I envision this one showing up in his high school graduation slide show :)

 

 

Rocking his world. Adding a sibling.

(caveat: I wrote this post a couple of weeks before baby girl was born. I'm not sure why I never got around to publish it, so my apologies. I'll write a follow-up at some point letting you know how all of this worked out.)

I know it’s not uncommon for parents to feel guilt about rocking their child’s world by bringing home a baby. But wow, I feel sad for Lucan. He’s not going to know why his parents are diverting their attention and love to someone else. I know the transition is going to be tough. It’s going to be tough on all of us!

Here are a couple of things I’ve picked up here and there about easing this time period for everyone.

1. Sibling gift for Lucan. I bought him some Dupo Legos from his favorite Jake and the Neverland Pirates show. Hopefully it’s a win and I don’t end up stepping on legos in the middle of the night.
2. We all went to a Big Brother Preparedness class. Let’s not talk about the fact that Lu missed part of it due to a tantrum timeout.
3. I’m planning on having a little “birthday party” for the baby when we come home from the hospital. Cupcakes and balloons. And then making a big deal over the fact over how special it is that Lucan can eat cupcakes but baby sister isn’t big enough.
4. We talk about fairly regularly the possibility that mom might not pick Lu up from school one day because she’ll be at the hospital and maybe grandpa or grandma or one of our friends might pick him up instead.
5. In the same breath we also talk about the fact that some morning Lu might wake up and find that mommy and daddy went to the hospital to have the baby and one of our friends might take him to school instead.
6. When Lu comes to meet his sister for the first time at the hospital, our plan is to not be holding baby girl at that time. We’ll give him a big hug and kiss to show Lu how much we love him and then introduce him.
7. I’ve assembled a few little dollar bin items/gifts for Lucan. That way if someone drops off something for the baby, Lu can pick out a little present of his own and not feel sad about his lack of love (trust me – I realize we’re going to have a lot of crap around our house come Christmas)
8. When I’ve been assembling things to reuse for the baby, I point them out to Lucan and thank him for sharing them with his sister. It’s kind of adorable to see him set aside his old racecar socks that are too small for sister.
9. Last night I told him the story of when he was born. I think it’s important to share these details so he knows how he came into the world.
10. We talk about what types of things to expect when the baby comes home. I took this prompt from his big brother’s class. Things like baby might cry a lot, she’s going to sleep and we’re going to have to be careful when we hold her. 
11. We've tried to limit any other major transitions to BB (before baby). For example, we moved Lucan out of his crib and into his big boy bed this summer. Lance wanted to wait until the end to do it. I put my foot down. Lucan doesn't sleep in his pack and play when we're traveling now. He sleeps on the futon at my parents and in the guest room at Lance's parents. The pack and play is clear for baby sister. 
12. Personify the baby. This post from a Cup of Jo is genius.

So, any other tips for this worried mama?

Why not: Lucan's 3 Year Stats (written in June)

I wrote this, well, a way long time ago after his birthday in June and never got around to publishing it. So better months and months late, than never, right?

Stats: 32 pounds, 38 inches tall, 51% percentile for height and weight. 

Wearing: Some 3T shirts, some 4T jammies and a lot of his 2T pants and shorts. This kiddo has thinned out some and his baby belly is diminishing. 

Milestones: The announcement of a baby brother or sister coming in December! Being 95% potty trained. We still put him in a pull-up at night, but he consistently stays dry during the day and through naps. We are careful to limit how much he gets to drink in the evening. If we watch fluid intake, he’ll wake up dry in the morning. We survived our longest road trip to date: driving to Michigan last summer. He’s on his third daycare since turning two. That must be some sort of new record. But the daycare center has turned out to be our best decision to date. No regrets. Lucan tells all of his teachers, by name, “bye bye” at the end of the day. Attending his first big screen movie, Frozen.

Eating: Lu loves candy. I can’t say that I’m surprised. He loves grapes and blueberries, chocolate milk, vanilla ice cream with chocolate on it (like Papa!), scrambled eggs, waffles, pancakes, bacon, peanut butter, frosting, peas, edamame, granola bars, lunchmeat, popsicles, string cheese, blueberry yogurt, mashed potatoes and gravy, chicken noodle soup, veggie beef soup, hot dogs, chicken McDonalds (chicken mcnuggets – GROSS), French fries, popcorn, sweet corn, queso dip, STEAK.  Man, can that kiddo pound steak like no one’s business.

Consistent dislikes: green peppers, onions, tomato soup, salsa, indian food.

Occasional dislikes: green beans, beets, focaccia bread, toast, pizza, non-string cheese.

Sleeping:  One nap. At school naptime is at 12:30PM. At home it’s 1:30PM. Most days he’ll sleep a solid two hours, sometimes on the weekends if we’ve had a busy morning he’ll sleep 2.5-3 hours. At night Lu goes down around 8:30PM and will sleep through the night unless he’s sick. Then all bets are off. Usual wake-up time is around 7:15AM, but sometimes Lucan will surprise us by sleeping in until 8AM or horrify us by creeping into our room at 6:30AM on a Saturday.

Saying: Everything. This kiddo is a talker. Non-stop chatter. And if you don’t respond quick enough, he’ll just repeat himself louder and louder until you do acknowledge him. And because I’m biased, I think his speech is pretty good and that he speaks pretty clearly. Lucan remembers people’s names and will bring them up in conversation. He’ll talk about his daycare teachers, his friends at church, our grown-up friends, our friends at small group, his grandparents, his cousins, his aunts and uncles, people that Lance and I are talking about in a conversation, basically everyone is Lu’s friend. It’s a cute age.

Some of the funnier things I’ve overheard from Lucan: “Grammer (grandma), I love you all the time.” “Mommy, no more snacks!” “I naughty. I hit and push. I do better TOMORROW.” “I’m a genius.” “I’m adorable.” “I don’t smell! You smell Mommy! (trying to convince him it’s bath time)

Loves: his favorite green blankie, construction equipment, farm equipment, trains, Daniel Tiger, Curious George, play dough, hiding under blankets, riding bikes, bounce houses. 

• Lu also loves to be “a big helper.” Usually this comes in the form of helping me with supper or helping Lance outside with yard stuff. Lucan will tell both of us solemnly “I’m a big helper.” He likes to use about two gallons of water to wash potatoes. But it keeps him happy and distracted, so I’m not complaining about the water bill.
• Lu goes through favorite book phases: Pigeon books, Thomas the Train books, Goodnight Goodnight Construction site, Daisy books. He loves being sung to; some of his favorite songs are: Jesus Loves Me, Twinkle Twinkle, Hickory Dickory Dock, Jesus Loves the Little Children, The Wise Man Built his House Upon a Rock.
•  Lu loves church and the singing. I think Lucan thinks it’s fun to see our friends there.
• Technology. I know some parents don’t let their children watch television or play with computers or iPhones or iPads. We are not those parents. Lucan loves anything with a screen. He especially loves playing the game “Minion Rush” on the iPad. He’s awful, but not as bad as I am. He calls the minions “marshmallows.”

Dislikes: getting ready for bed or naptime. Sleeping in his bed (he wants to sleep on the floor).  

• Clocks (he especially dislikes my parents’ grandfather’s clock).
• THUNDER. Lucan’s terrified of storms. There was a major storm that came through last fall during the day while Lucan was at daycare. I kind of get the idea that our daycare provider had a mini meltdown and caused all of the kiddos to panic a bit. As a result Lucan will watch the skies very closely for any impending inclement weather and ask us if it’s going to rain. We’ve reassured him several times that Mom and Dad will keep him safe, but he still gets really worried.
• Then there’s the gimmies: listening to Mom and Dad, being told “no” or having to end something that’s really fun.

When I grow up ... I want to be a firetruck. This morning it was a dinosaur.

Playing pretend at school, going to the grocery store: I buy raisins. (everyone else chose stuff like milk, cookies, apples. True to Lucan, he bought raisins. Lance was proud.)